To Know My Enemy

I should start this post with a belated happy b-day wish to Josh Murphy. Mandi reminded me that I needed to tell him this, and yet I completely forgot about it on the day. So here it is buddy. Happy B-day. The stories that I read about just a minute ago on Philip's blog were quite humorous to say the least.

I am quite impressed with how quickly the Murphy's (Paul in particular) could jump directly to the assumption that the man in the elevator is short. It seems kind of ironic to me...but maybe I'm the only one. The solution is indeed that the man is a dwarf. Here is the solution pulled from the website: The man is a midget. He can't reach the upper elevator buttons, but he can ask people to push them for him. He can also push them with his umbrella. Clever, no?

You know, without fail, it seems that lots of parents that really don't have a clue about a particular sport think that somehow they would make the best possible choice to be a coach. Take, for instance, this idiot of a parent (I'm assuming he's a parent at least) that today comes over to us while we're practicing, and tells us to quit playing "musical chairs" with the field and to pick a side. Our rebuttal? That the previous week they had complained we were on the wrong side of the field, and were told that we were supposed to be on the side we were using today. His response? To walk off without saying anything. He then comes back later on, and tells us that we shouldn't be running a drill for footwork on the touchline cause it will mess up the line. He then tells our kids to get off the line. Are you serious? Honestly, outside of his track suit looking thing that he was wearing to cover his beer belly, I doubt he knows the first thing about soccer. The only drills I've seen him making his kids run on their side of the field are the exact same things that we do. Their practice starts 30 minutes after ours, and he's usually there about when we get going. Seems kinda strange. Hopefully we won't have to put up with anymore crap from him.

What is about kids that really have no skill having parents become complete jerks because they think their kid is the best thing to ever grace the earth? It doesn't really matter what it's in. It can be sports, academics, practically anything that has an ability that is capable of being shown to other people. I think back to this time with my brother's competitive soccer team. There was an overweight kid who could really only play goalie, except he was horrible, and therefore never really played. His dad, wondering why he wouldn't be put on in front of the athletic goalie who could kick, dive, punt, catch a ball, or move when a ball was kicked at him decided he would form his own team built around the athletic beast that was his son. He attempted to persuade some people on my brother's team to join, and all refused. He therefore went to the AYSO league, and got some of the players from there. They formed a team, and the father of this poor boy coached, of course so his son would play every game. The best part? My brother's team completely demolished that team every single time they played. I would guess the closest score in any game was maybe 4-0. I think the team broke up after about 2 years of getting owned repeatedly. I'm all for supporting your kids and encouraging them and everything, but by the time they are 14 and 15 and obviously are not meant to be playing said sport/participating in said event/whatever, I think the parents might want to consider more than their personal pride and find better ways of encouraging them then attempting to mold the world to them. I'm not of the belief that you should just serve up everything for your kids on a silver platter. But that's just me.

I don't really know what it's like, not being a parent myself, but I guess that some parents might be trying to make up for things that they weren't able to succeed in through their kids. Maybe that's why some kids are pushed so hard in things that they obviously don't want to do. Maybe that's why some parents go off the deep end when their children don't seem to quite make the cut at something. So what that they're not the star whatever that you wanted them to be. Think of all the other things that they are brilliant at and praise them and support them in those. Don't run them down in the things that they aren't as passionate about simply because you want to be that proud parents that can say, "My kid won ____ that I wasn't able to". If there's something that annoys me more than anything it's listening to people try and one-up each other using their kids. There were plenty of parents like that in my high school. Some parent chimes in with how great their child is doing in whatever. Another comes back and say that they're doing that, in addition to whatever else. And on and on and on. Please.

Wow. There's a rant for you, huh. I guess if I have to put up with this annoying coach, Monday and Thursday posts will be a little more venomous than before. So let's end it on some good notes. Mandi comes home in two weeks, which is exceptionally exciting. She's even told me that she is ready to come home, which is never something that I thought I would ever hear her say. Spring break is fast approaching, and my brother will be in town for the week, which will be quite cool. Should be some good volleyball and frisbee action going down if we can get some people together. The rec league soccer season begins this coming Sunday. I'm looking forward to it, as it will be nice to play against some people that are not 4 feet tall. Not that there's anything wrong with being 4 feet tall when you're in middle school or anything...

To keep things rolling, here's another riddle for you to have a crack at. Since I'm science minded, I found this one quite intriguing. You have to know a few things about Venus and such, which I did not remember at the initial reading of this riddle. It's a good one though.

Venus:
You awake inside a small transparent capsule sitting on the surface of Venus. From a small speaker you hear a voice that says, "We will leave you here either for a day or a year. If you choose to stay a day, we will give you $1 million. If you choose to stay a year, we will give you $2 million. Either way, you will have sufficient food and water. We will make sure the temperature is a constant 70 degrees Fahrenheit. We will also supply cable TV."What is your choice? (Don't let money decide your answer).